This room is how I feel some days

Way too often I let him make gigantic messes, just because he's having so much fun doing it I hate to make him quit.  The only problem with that, is that he continues to think its the most fun he's ever had and wants to make the same mess over and over again.  Which is why I should have never let him play with the cereal boxes.  Cheerios.  Everywhere.  Or "unpack" the fridge.  See that Pampers box?  It was nicely packed tight with clothes that no longer fit, ready to be moved to the attic.  Now they are all in a messy pile in that laundry basket.  Have I mentioned how much I hate anything having to do with laundry?  Folding, ugh.

Anyway, I say this room is how I feel some days.  Just a huge mess.  Part of it I'll blame on pregnancy hormones, most of it is probably just me.  I go and go and then one day I hit my breaking point and have a nervous breakdown over stupid little things.  That happened a few days ago.  
What spurred my latest mental breakdown was a stupid pumpkin.  I was on my way out the front door, planning on running a quick errand (to the library so I could stop receiving notices that my book was overdue).  I'm carrying Shepherd and WALK into a pumpkin, stubbing my toe.  It was so painful, I thought I was going to pass out.  I go back in the house with my foot dripping blood and put Shep in his crib so I can survey the damage.  I'm too big to really bend over, but can tell there is all this pumpkin wedged underneath my toenail.  I'll spare you more details.
That night Joey had to "perform surgery" on my toe, and it was quite dramatic and I made him stop halfway through because it hurt too bad.  Then I had my mental breakdown, crying about my toe and everything else.  Mainly I was just freaking out thinking I was going to have to have my toe amputated, and I didn't know how I was going to get to the doctor, then I moved on to stressing that the nursery isn't even close to being finished, we haven't bought anything, and I want a doula and haven't even looked into it and then I was upset that I cried so much and now my head hurts, and why can't I ever find tylenol when I need it, and tylenol is the only thing you can take when pregnant...wah wah wah.
The next morning I cried some more when I couldn't find a podiatrist to get me in, and the urgent treatment clinic told me if I came to them they would have to remove my whole toenail.  
But it all worked out, I finally found a podiatrist, I made my sister in law come with me in case I needed amputation ;) , which I didn't, it was thankfully an easy fix and I just have a bruised toe now.  I ordered the crib, emailed a doula, and feel much better now that its FRIDAY!

P.S.  It was really embarrassing that I'm pretty sure no one at the podiatrist office believed I just walked into a pumpkin.  They all assumed I kicked it and have rage issues :(




  1. Jessica, geez .. just calm down and quit taking your rage out on the innocent pumpkins. ;) Ughhh, toe injuries are truly the worst. And finger slamming injuries are pretty close in comparison - I went through that recently and almost two months later my finger nail is finally looking normal.

    I feel like my life looks like that room most of the time too.. and I don't have kids.. which makes me terrified to have kids. ;) But then again I'm going to have mental breakdowns with or without them for one reason or another - so why not? Can't wait to experience pregnancy hormones.. whee. Hang in there .. and wear closed toed shoes! :D

    1. Haha! I know, they probably thought I hate Halloween or something ;)